The Fans Have Spoken: Cubs to Finish Negative Infinityth

Y'all are expecting a pretty stinking good draft position in 2011.

The final tally is in, and it's unanimous: the Cubs won't finish in 2nd place. I'm guessing everyone who didn't vote 3rd, 4th, or 5th was kidding, but the winning choice of Negative Infinityth feels like the sincerely correct one. I hope to show before tomorrow night's game that the Cubs have been much tougher to watch over the past month or so than they will look the rest of the way. I'm not predicting a World Series push next year, but they won't be this bad. They aren't really this bad now.

But lately it's been brutal viewing. For me, it's almost like the short-lived spin-off, Joey. I felt compelled to watch out of  loyalty to my Central Perk Friends, even though I knew it was making me dumber. I've already given you the tongue-in-cheek reasons to watch, but now I want to know for real: are you watching? Please let your indifference be heard!

Thanks for voting.

Caption Contest Winner, Fan Poll, Miscellany, and Procrastination

You'll have to wait to see part 2. I need a break.

Unlike the Cubs, we have a winner! Our dart board panel of lobotomized reprobates judges has reached a decision in the Farewell to Theriot Photo Caption Contest, and it's not who you think . . . unless you think it's Sue, but I won't spoil it. You've really got to view her major award in all its unparalleled glory.

Also, pt. 2 of the half-decent expectations post is on hold until I return from my impromptu session of sitting around and doing nothing. But don't let that stop you from voting in the fan poll with your expectations of where the Cubs will wind up in the NL Central Standings. At the time of this post, Negative Infinityth is threatening to run away with the competition, and the Cubs are threatening to make good on that prediction.

Thanks for playing, thanks for voting, and thanks to Cubs Fan Report, the best Cubs daily email update this side of the Mendoza Line for the kind words and links in yesterday's report and for, subjecting people to this site notwithstanding, doing an amazing job of aggregating a ton of great Cubs info into one low-price Walmartesque (only without the creepiness and global oppression) location.